How to Break Up With Your Therapist

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Published Date|
June 24, 2023

How to Break Up With Your Therapist


There are so many reasons why you might hate your therapist.


Maybe they said something that offended you they fell asleep during your session or you just don't like their vibe.


You may have put so much time and effort into researching and finding the perfect therapist only to meet with them and realizing you absolutely hate them. Working with KMA Therapy, we see so many people come in discouraged because they just really didn't like their last therapist. And don't worry, that is totally normal.


But here at KMA Therapy, our job is to have your back and make sure you find the right fit for you. After watching this video, you’ll know five reasons you may not like your therapist, and how to break up with them when you know it’s time to go.

5 Reasons You Might Not Like Your Therapist


Here are the five most common reasons why people don't like their therapist, and what to do when you know it's just time to walk away.


1. Personality Differences


Number one is personality differences. This might sound so superficial, but it is a completely valid reason. The number one predictor of therapeutic progress is actually how much you like your therapist.


For example, you might be the kind of person who loves to laugh and swear and tell funny stories. But if your therapist is uptight it is going to be a good match.


2. No Rapport


Two: No rapport. A therapist could be the perfect match for you on paper but the energy just completely falls flat in person.


No one can predict when this is going to happen and it can make you totally dread going to therapy. It's normal for therapy to be hard, but you shouldn't be dreading going every week.


3. They Only Listen – And Rarely Talk


Number three: They listen to you, but they don't really add any value to your sessions. We find that so many people want to receive feedback and challenges from their therapists, based off all the time they've spent during the assessment phase in therapy.


Therapy is supposed to be challenging. If your therapist is just passively listening, you're not getting any return on the investment of your time and your energy.


The difference between a therapist and a friend is that a therapist has skills experience and expertise. A therapist who is only listening is not using their therapeutic skills and interventions – and long term, most people will not benefit from that approach.


4. You Feel Judged


Number four is that you feel judged by your therapist. Nobody wants to feel judged – and let's be real. During therapy, you’re opening up about your deepest and darkest secrets. Feeling judged can literally halt any progress you're making in therapy and just make you feel ashamed. And that is not why you came to therapy.


5. Your Therapists Did Something Unethical


Number five: Your therapist did something unethical. Now, no therapist should be doing anything unethical, but we've all heard those horror stories of a therapist answering a phone call during the session.


The consequences of your therapist doing anything unethical are huge. If your therapist takes a phone call, falls asleep during your session, or breaks your confidentiality in any way that’s just such a bad indication and it can make it impossible to trust them.


Breaking Up With Your Therapist


So if you've experienced any of these five things, and you've decided it's time to move on, what do you do?


You might decide to leave them a note with the reasons why you're leaving, but it's also okay to just ghost them.


Now, if you're at a large practice with a lot of therapists, you can always ask to speak to the clinical director and see if there's another therapist there that would be a better match for you.


Some practices will offer a free session to match you with another therapist and some practices don't. Either way, switching therapists is completely normal and many people do this several times over the course of their lifetime.


Remember, just because that therapist isn't for you it doesn't mean therapy isn't for you.

Next Steps for Starting Therapy (Again)


Here at KMA, we’ve been matching our clients with amazing therapists for over 14 years.


But even we don't get it right all the time. If we don't, we will not leave you hanging.


If you don't like their therapist at any point in your therapy journey, we offer you a free matchmaking session to pair you with the right therapist and a free session with that therapist.


Our top priority is making sure you are cared for and that you get the help you deserve.


If you're interested in having an introductory session here at KMA and starting your therapy journey with us, just fill out the Register Online form below, or you can book online using our online scheduler.


If you’re not yet ready to book an appointment, check out these articles to keep learning:


Author |
Emily Weatherhead (Guest Author)
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