How To Set Boundaries in Your Relationships
We all must have “hard talks” at some point in our lives:
Whether we are resigning from a job, confronting a pushy relative, or even ending a relationship that isn’t serving us anymore.
These talks can be nerve-wracking, terrifying, and even frightening in the days leading up to them. We feel guilt for things not turning out the way we would have hoped. While these talks might be difficult, they are possible (and usually productive if you know if it is the right decision).
Here are my top tips on how to get through, and survive, the dreaded ‘hard talk.’:
1. Write down all your points:
It doesn’t matter how many or how few you have. Having a point of reference to go back to if you lose your train of thought is a blessing when you’re lost for words.
2. Visualize the conversation:
Think about what you’re going to wear, picture yourself saying the things you’re planning to say, imagine what the reaction will be like from the other person, and also picture yourself walking away feeling satisfied. Visual preparation is one of the most effective ways to calm your nerves before the big discussion.
3. Remember that the ‘worst case scenario’ might not actually happen:
Although you may have suspicions, you really have no idea how the other party will react. They may actually surprise you by hearing your words with grace and dignity, in which case you would have worried for nothing.
4. Don’t back out:
If you have a goal for this meeting, keep it. Do not let tears, promises, or even pleading let you change your mind (as you will very likely end up in the same situation again in a short time). You will thank yourself for staying true to your original plan.
